Dear Counselor:  I am a 30-something man with a good job, a good attitude and reasonably good looks. I am happily single, and that is the source of the problem. I’m constantly being approached by well-meaning church members, friends and family with someone they feel I must meet. They assume I’m unhappy without a mate, or that I’m secretly gay. They’re wrong on both counts, but how do I convince them otherwise?

Dear Friend:

Although it happens much less now than in the past, many cultures including ours consider marriage as the most desirable lifestyle.  It is especially so in church circles where family life is highly respected as God’s original plan for men and women.  But today’s society has little to do with the time of creation and the reality is that neither marriage nor singlehood is a guarantee of happiness.  

The truth is that some will continue to put pressure on you and you need to tell them kindly that marriage is a personal choice to be made by those involved and not by others.  In your conversation with those well-meaning church members, friends and family, consider the following suggestions:

1.       Outline your speech.  Know what you are going to tell them: simple reasons why you, for the time being, are not seeking a partner, and how well you feel being single—in your job, relating to your friends and family, and leading a successful life. 

2.       Emphasize the altruistic reasons why one might choose to remain single rather than the egotistical ones: better service to your community rather than more time for yourself, more time to commune with God rather than less effort to have to adjust to life with a partner, etc.

3.       If the person believes in the Bible, you may explain (without sermonizing) that even the Bible praises godly single people such as Elijah, Daniel, Jeremiah, John the Baptist, Paul, and Barnabas.  Paul specifically approves of both states, single and married (1 Corinthians 7).   

4.       Be correct, respectful, and make use of good manners.  At the same time, state your position clearly and firmly.

5.       Do not use threats.  Instead, make sure you explain to them that you know they mean well and they just want to help, but that you need to be respected and protected from pressure in this very personal area.

6.       Request that they refrain from pressuring you or joking about the matter.  If you ask them courteously and respectfully, people will honor your wish.  

7.       Remember to converse with a smile and with a positive tone.  Otherwise, they may conclude that you are sour and will continue to be so until the day you marry!

Lastly, nourish your relationship with the Lord every day.  If you reflect Jesus in your life, others will perceive you not as a single young man but rather as Jesus’ follower and friend.

Dear Counselor is a service of Julian Melgosa, Linda Ivy and Austin Archer of the Walla Walla University School of Education and Psychology.

My seven siblings and I have what we call our “favorite” argument. 

We call it that for two reasons – one, it’s our favorite argument, and two, it’s about who was our dad’s favorite.

      Nancy says it was her because she was the firstborn, and everyone knows the firstborn is the favorite.�
      Gale says it was her because the kid you love the most is the one who’s having trouble, and since she claims to have had more trouble in her life than the rest of us have had, she feels she’s obviously been the favorite.
      Diana argues that Daddy’s nick name for her proves that she was the favorite. Why would you call your daughter “Pie Face” unless she was your favorite??
      Curly (Darrell) was the firstborn son…
      Nick was the one who really got into Daddy’s logging and trucking and heavy equipment…
      Russ was the one that followed Dad’s lead with accounting…
      Debby was the baby, and everyone knows the baby is the favorite…
      I am actually the seventh in the line-up, showing up in between Russ and Debby, and I like to remind my siblings that seven is the perfect number. This doesn’t seem to have convinced my siblings of anything, but I think it’s pretty compelling. On top of that, my dad once bought me a MOTORCYCLE. Granted, it was just a little Honda 90 (that I named Zelda), but this argument usually gets to my brothers, because he didn’t ever buy them motorcycles of any kind or even let them buy their own. (If you knew my brothers, you’d understand the wisdom here.)
 Once, just for some variety, we argued about who was mother’s favorite, which she found highly entertaining. We’re a rather boisterous group when we’re all together like that, and the stories and laughter occupied us for a couple of hours. The next time we all got together, Diana and Gale had T-shirts for each of which said “Mom likes me best” and a sweatshirt for my mother that said “Mom”. Yes, we took pictures!
      “I had spent my life knowing I was Daddy’s favorite,” reveals Nancy. “At his funeral, I realized each one of us knew we were his favorite.”
      As I think about it, my (fairly cranky) grandmother had observed the phenomenon long before we recognized it.  “I’ve never, in my entire life, seen EIGHT ‘only’ children!” I heard her complain one day. “You’re all SPOILED ROTTEN!” I don’t think she meant it as a compliment, but I rather liked the idea. Eight favorites! I’m cool with that!
 And as a parent, I get it. I only have two kids, but each one is my favorite. They are VERY different from each other, but I love each one as fully as if he/she were the only one. It doesn’t take both of them having the same great need at the very same time to get my attention – it just takes ONE of them having a need, whether it’s simple or complex, a delight to meet, or soul stretching.  Ever since the day they were born, I have known that if it ever actually came down to it, I would give up my very life for either one of them, no thought needed. I wouldn’t say, “Well, if both of them would benefit…” No! Only one of them would need me to do it.
      I have a little tiny glimpse, then, of how it is that the following thought from Ellen White can be possible: “The relations between God and each soul are as distinct and full as though there were not another soul upon the earth to share His watchcare, not another soul for whom He gave His beloved Son.” Steps to Christ, page 100
 Pretty cool to think about, isn’t it?  I’m God’s favorite!
      And so are you.
�
 Questions: With God’s love so abundantly clear in Scripture, all around us in nature, in our hymns, in countless devotional writings, in His amazing work and presence in each life… Why do so many people struggle with feeling and believing that God doesn’t really love them? Have you struggled over this? Do you “get it” now? What is the best way to help people with this? What has helped (or hindered) you?

DO YOU RECOGNIZE THIS?

This building was the precursor to an existing Adventist academy in the North Pacific Union Conference. During the 1920s it housed 10 grades of students who were trained to partner with area pastors and churches for evangelistic visitation throughout a major Northwest city. Here’s a clue: The current academy is very near to an Adventist medical center. What was the original school called? What is its current name? If you think you have the answer, add your comments below or email us at talk@gleaneronline.org.

Do you know where this photo was taken? Do you know approximately when this was taken or several of the people pictured? Leave your comments below.

     We were strolling down the beach, barefoot, hand in hand, with the blush of Friday’s sunset in the soft summer air.  It seemed a good moment for a song like “Day is dying in the West” or “Wide, Wide as the Ocean”. Sure enough, a song came to me, but it wasn’t one of those. It was another one I’d learned as a child:

Herman met Sally on the beach one night

The sea was calm and the starfish were bright

He looked at her, and she looked at him

And it was: True love at first sight!

The story turns out to be a bit of a tragedy, however, for Herman’s family did NOT accept Sally. As only the Smothers Brothers could tell and sing the story, we learn that Herman was a lobster. And Sally was a crab. The chorus breaks the woeful news:

Crabs walk sideways and lobsters walk straight

And we won’t let you take her for a mate!

Growing up, I had a collection of Smothers Brothers records – about six of them, from their early, more innocent days – and I had those long-play vinyls memorized. I could recite their routines like “Mom always liked you best!” and “Cream of the ‘sparakeet soup” and “Black is the color of my love’s true hair”.  It has not just been years, it has been decades since I’ve heard those songs, but they’re still there in my mind and pop up at unexpected times. Like this one. And my husband is not as delighted by these songs as I am, so I kept this one to myself while we walked and while it went around and around and around in my head.

On another walk recently, friends and I spontaneously took turns starting theme songs to childhood sitcoms. We hadn’t heard them for decades, but they were back instantly:

Just sit right back and you’ll hear a tale, a tale of a fateful trip …

A horse is a horse, of course, of course…

The bluest skies you’ve ever seen are in Seattle…

(Many of you know them, too, don’t you?)

Amazing, isn’t it, how the things we learned as children stick with us? My husband and his brother had never heard of the Smothers Brothers – they grew up on The Bible in Living Sound records and occasionally lapse into bits of conversation such as “Noooooooah! If you can hear me, and I know you can…”

My dad, who hadn’t attended church since his early 20’s, could, in his 60’s, still recite the Bible verses he had learned as a child in Sabbath School.

But back to Herman and Sally, the lobster and the crab. While I don’t have a problem with the silly little song itself, Sabbath was approaching and I really wanted to focus on something else. So I did what I often do when I’m trying to change my thoughts: I considered several alternatives (in this case, songs that fit the moment) and chose one:

Over and over, like a mighty sea,

Comes the love of Jesus, rolling over me!

It’s another catchy one, and more beautiful than ever with the waves rolling in over and over my feet. All weekend long, when my mind defaulted to “Crabs walk sideways and lobsters walk straight”, I chose to change channels. I chose “Over and over, like a mighty sea”. At one point, I started singing it aloud, and Jon joined in with the counter tune of “Over the sea, over the sea, Jesus, Saviour, pilot me…”

I love that song! Learned it as a little kid…

Knowing as we do how powerful those childhood lessons are, WHY WHY WHY do we so often waste them??? WHY do we spend so much time, even in our children’s Sabbath Schools, on empty (in my opinion) songs like… Well, maybe I’d better be careful here and not name any because I might name your favorites.

WHY are we so seldom teaching our children their memory verses anymore? WHY are we teaching them fewer and fewer songs of substance? In our homes, WHY are we watching so much random TV and so many worldly DVD’s and spending SO LITTLE time (if any) in family worship and teaching our children the Bible?

Were your parents intentional about teaching you spiritual songs? Did they lead you in memorizing Bible passages? Did anyone give you any helpful guidance about what to put in your mind along the way? What difference did it make in your life?

What wisdom do you have for today’s parents and children’s ministries leaders on this issue?

Dear Counselor: My boyfriend has recently become ultra-religious. He is constantly reading spiritual books or watching sermons on video. I feel he has become entirely unbalanced to the point where he has no desire to just spend time with me. While I appreciate and love spiritual things, I believe there are other areas of life which are also important. What can I do to help him understand how his attitude is affecting me and his other friends?

Dear Friend:

If as a result of all the religious readings and sermon viewings, your boyfriend is not becoming increasingly kind, courteous, compassionate, and aware of others’ needs, perhaps he is getting into the path of fanaticism.  You may be in a position to help him lead a more balanced life.   

In order to do so, ask God for an extra measure of tact, patience, and wisdom for a caring attitude and appropriate messages to your boyfriend.  Remember Solomon’s words: The hearts of the wise make their mouths prudent, and their lips promote instruction. Gracious words are a honeycomb, sweet to the soul and healing to the bones” (Proverbs 16:23-24). 

A good way to start is by discussing with him a number of activities you both enjoy.  Then suggest that you spend time together reading devotional books (or watching sermons).  You want to state clearly that you appreciate and love spiritual things.  Exchanging religious ideas and insights can be quite an uplifting experience.  But also explain to him that, after the devotional activities, you both need to engage in other healthy pastimes that will make your relationship whole.

In your communication about his excessive devotion to spiritual things, do not sermonize or nag.  Rather, recognize his religious fervor but also the need to be balanced and to participate in multiple activities.  It may be helpful to involve other friends in those activities so that he is exposed to a variety of people and styles, which may help to broaden his exclusive religious emphasis.  At an appropriate time, you can explain to him that Jesus spent time with the Father in prayer, but also socialized with his best friends: Lazarus, Martha and Mary.  About this friendship, Ellen G. White says: “His heart was knit by a strong bond of affection to the family at Bethany… often, when weary, thirsting for human fellowship, He had been glad to escape to this peaceful household… Our Saviour appreciated a quiet home and interested listeners.  He longed for human tenderness, courtesy, and affection.”—The Desire of Ages, pp. 524-525. 

As time goes on, your careful and loving efforts should bring positive results.  But if your prayerful attempts to bring your mutual relationship to a more balanced position are fruitless, interpret it as a sign that you may need to re-evaluate the relationship.

Dear Counselor is a service of Julian Melgosa, Linda Ivy and Austin Archer of the Walla Walla University School of Education and Psychology.

Dear Counselor is a service of Julian Melgosa, Linda Ivy and Austin Archer of the Walla Walla University School of Education and Psychology.

Is it crazy to suggest we start casting out demons and raising the dead?

If you think I’m not  in my right mind asking such a question, I would remind you that in Matthew 10:8, Jesus instructed His disciples (and presumably you and me) to “heal the sick, raise the dead, cleanse lepers, and cast out demons” as an integral part of sharing the gospel message.

It seems to me we’re quick to discuss healing the sick and cleansing lepers.  But when’s the last time you heard SDA Christians talking about raising the dead or casting out demons?  Will the role of the demonic be included in any of the formal presentations on the church’s first-ever International Conference on “Emotional Health & Wellness!” scheduled to take place October  12 – 15 at Loma Linda University?

I wanted to know, so I called the GC Health Ministries Department to ask.   No one was available to take my call.  But I did receive a call just at deadline for this piece from a very nice person who told me that the only person in the department familiar with the Conference was out on an extended health-related leave.  So no one remaining could answer my question.

By the way, as I’ve researched such mental illnesses as Tourettes, Asperger’s, Autism, and Schizophren-ia, I note that the behavioral science community offers no specific causes for these diagnoses.  The same holds true for Bipolar disorder which the authors of the book, Sway, point out came into existence largely through pharmaceutical company marketing of Prozac, Paxil, and Zoloft.  Prozac, by the way, has now been shown to be no more effective than sugar pills.[1]

Is there any reason not to think the demonic might play a role in these illnesses?

Despite Ellen White’s contention that multitudes are under the control of demons today just as they were in Jesus’ time,[2] doesn’t the whole demonic thing seem just plain weird in today’s modern world? BTW, do you think that homosexuality, too, might have demonic origins?  Read this letter from a young man to a popular advice columnist and tell me what you think:

 “I am a male in my early twenties.  I have never had any sexual interest in men.  Even though my re-lationships with women have been few and far between, I have always been attracted to them.

“Recently I had a dream that I was with another man.  Since then I have been very confused.  My sex drive has diminished, and I find that I am questioning my sexual orientation .

“I have no desire to be with a man, but the fact that I had a dream like that has left me flustered and wondering how something like that could have come into my head.”[3]

The columnist had no answer and suggested that he come up with his own interpretation of the dream, perhaps with the help of a therapist. 

Now I don’t believe for a minute that all of our dreams are devil produced.  But I’d like to suggest that one was.  And how devastating such an event must be for the poor soul who doesn’t have a clue what is really going on and concludes, “That must be the way I am.”

In one horrifying sentence, the Bible says the natural man (unconverted, in other words) can be “taken captive by (the devil) at his will.”—2 Timothy 2:26 (KJV).

It’s interesting to observe the increasing number of media personalities—CNN’s Anderson Cooper and Don Lemon, for example—who are known to be gay (Lemon has announced it). Wouldn’t that make sense if you were the devil, to go after people who were highly visible presenters of the news?  What an impact that would have in giving homosexuality an aura of acceptance!

And since Matthew 10:8 references raising the dead, does that only mean those who are dead in their sins?  If you think so, please read Greg Rudd’s One Miracle After Another, the story of Pastor Pavel Goia and some of the incredible events of his early life.  You’ll be amazed at the story of the boy who died beneath the wheels of Pastor Goia’s car who came back to life after being pronounced dead and his body sent to the hospital morgue over night.  What happened the next morning when the keeper of the morgue arrived for work will amaze you.  Contact your nearby ABC for this wonderful book.

Despite the craziness that has happened in the past over the demonic (prolonged exorcisms led by church folks attempting to cast the demons of allergies or the demon of chocolate out of someone, for instance), I wish to conclude with an appeal for anyone reading this blog to consider what it might mean if he or she took seriously the words of Jesus in Matthew 10:8. 

Relationship guru John Gottman[1] says 69 percent of the issues all couples face in their relation-ships never get resolved. 

If you’re in a relationship, two-thirds of the issues you will face (You never take the garbage out.  You always leave dirty dishes in the sink. You overdrew the checking account again…) will be irreconcilable. 

Intriguingly, however, the Masters of relationships do just fine despite neither partner ever coming around to the other’s viewpoint, but the Disasters of relationships crash and burn (fight or break up), Gottman says. 

Oh, by the way, where do you see yourself in this arena?  Are you a Master or a Disaster when it comes to personal relationships?

I tell couples I counsel, “Love is never enough.  Work at meeting each other’s primary relation-ship needs.  Then tackle your differences.”  Most couples I work with admit they don’t know their partner’s top relationship needs.  Do you know yours?

Before I married Diane 15 years ago, I asked her what her primary relationship needs were.  She replied, “I need to be worshipped and adored.”  I told her, “I worship God, but I’m willing to adore you.”   She replied, “That’ll work.”  And so far, it has.

Author Harville Hendrix[2] contends that most of us have relationship expectations at a subcon-scious level.  When we meet someone special, he says, we drape those expectations over the other person, unaware that we’re doing this.  We just expect the other person to intuit our relationship needs and are majorly unhappy when they don’t. 

In the movie, “Don Juan De Marco”, aging psychiatrist Marlon Brando has an epiphany when he’s in his 70’s and asks his wife of many years, Fay Dunaway, about her hopes and dreams.  She gets teary, and in one of the movie’s great lines, replies, “I thought you’d never ask.”  May I suggest that you and your partner (if you have one) might do well to ask about the other’s relationship needs if you’ve never done that.

But let’s switch gears now and examine some issues the two of you never get resolved? (You drive too fast.  You’re always on the phone.  You never pick up after yourself.  You’re too easy on the kids.  You spend way too much on…) How well you do will depend to what extent you’re a Relationship Master and not a Disaster.  Here are some points I make at men’s conferences about handling relationship issues.  Most of them should work for women as well.

1.  Just go along if It’s not life threatening.  Case in point.  Diane and I are empty nesters, but she likes to shop at COSTCO.   Ridiculous, I used to tell her, especially when it comes to pur-chasing produce.  Because COSTCO only sells larger quantities, lots of our produce goes bad before the two of us can eat it.  I used to complain about this.  Then I learned something.  Shopping at COSTCO (one of her few indulgences) brings her pleasure.   So I’ve learned to back off.  Sometimes I even help her unload the car and lug in the 500-lb. (just kidding) buckets of kitty litter she brings home.

2.  Pray (silently) when the matter is not resolvable.   Once when Diane was going off on something I did (I threw out one of her half-dead plants without asking her first), I told her I couldn’t believe we were even discussing such a mundane matter.  She assured me we were.  Finally in a brilliant stroke, I shut up, prayed silently for God’s intervention, and watched Him intervene.  And He really did.  By the next morning, we were fine again.

3.  Go from “you never” to “you always”.  Diane says when she’s tempted to tell me I “never” clean out the garage that she’s learned to say to herself, “But at least he empties the dish-washer.”  The point?  Practice saying something positive to yourself about your partner every time you get upset about a relationship difference.  Do this and your relationship will prosper.

4.  Choose to have low horizontal expectations.  By now you know you and your partner won’t agree on every topic, so cool your jets when disagreements arise.  And, remember, as my friend Clarence Schilt says, we tend to sin more when we’re right and right is not happening.  So once you’ve made your point, why do you have to control the outcome?  Do you always have to be right?  Why not give your partner permission to be wrong once in a while!

5.  Be sure you’re emptied of self if you’re dying for a good relationship.  Self is the enemy most to be feared.  So make the choice every day for the Holy Spirit to drain off all of your natural self, replacing it with a brand new Jesus self (“It’s no longer I who live, but Christ Who lives in me.”—Galatians 2:20)  This won’t make you a wimp; it will simply enable you to be more balanced in knowing when to take a stand and when not to in dealing with your differences.

Remember, (if Gottman got it right), all of us should expect our relationship differences to never get resolved.  But you and your partner can sail along smoothly anyway IF you become a Relationship Master.  It’s your call, of course.  Some folks would rather fight.  I hope you’re not one of them.

_____________________________________________________________________________  Mike Jones leads seminars on reconnecting with inactive members and does a certain amount of couple counseling.  His newest books are entitled Help, Lord, I Blew It Again and Sometimes I Don’t Feel Like Praying.  Reach him at www.reconnectnow.org or mjones@paclink.com.  

I am preparing to mentor a coworker in my present occupational field as he tries for the fourth time to pass a certification test.  He has worked in our field for 10+ years, and he knows his stuff, but he absolutely comes unglued when it comes time for any test.  I have seen him fret and stew for five minutes over one question instead of moving on and coming back when he’s made it through the test.  He hyperventilates, sweats, and shows all sorts of other signs of anxiety.  What can I do to help him diminish his anxiety?

Dear Sam,

It is certainly frustrating to be knowledgeable in something and be unable to demonstrate it because of the anxious barrier.  There are a number of things your colleague can do and you can certainly help in the process:

1. Overlearning.  To study above and beyond the point of initial mastery is highly recommendable to those with test anxiety.  Study the content over and over again leads to automaticity of response.  Your colleague would not forget his home address even in a situation of high arousal because he has learned it too well. 
2. Rehearsal.  The more he takes tests under similar circumstances (in a classroom) or computer terminal, the less tension he will experience.
3. Relaxation.  If he approaches the beginning of a practice test in a state of relaxation and maintains it using breathing and self-instruction messages, he may get involved in the task and forget his anxiety.
4. Self-help group.  Some with this problem are helped tremendously by temporarily joining a group of persons with the same problem.  Doctors’ and psychologists’ offices frequently post advertisements to this effect or have names of people that are looking for others to meet and gain insight from each other. 
5. Prayer.  If your friend is a man of faith, he will benefit from prayer in order to achieve a more relaxing state and receive the support and power that come from God.  Doing this fervently in preparation for the exam and at intervals during the actual assessment has a profound effect on the believer. 

Lastly, it could be that your friend suffers from a severe case of anxiety and then he needs to see a psychologist.  Psychologists use cognitive-behavioral techniques to deal with fears and phobias that are reported to be effective in about 80% of the cases treated.  Also, professional associations and examining boards usually have policies to make accommodations (typically a more relaxing environment to write the text or additional time to take it) to those with anxiety who have been properly diagnosed.

I hope you will be able to use some of the above advice and that your colleague may soon overcome this barrier.

Dear Counselor is a service of Julian Melgosa, Linda Ivy and Austin Archer of the Walla Walla University School of Education and Psychology.

 The Lord was certainly going to pull me through my highly stressful week, but my sister’s call caught me at a grumpy, faithless moment. “I can’t believe everything I do for these people!” was the essence of my attitude as I poured out my woe. “Somebody should give me a plaque!”

                Always quick to recognize and encourage people, Diana sent me something far better than a plaque – she sent a giant, gorgeous bouquet of flowers. She told the florist to sign every family member’s name under a familiar saying: “You never cease to amaze us!”

It was a great thought, but the florist didn’t get it quite right. Imagine my confusion when accompanying such a beautiful arrangement of flowers was a card that said, “You never seem to admire us.”

                Though somewhat perplexed by the message, I knew Diana’s heart, recognized the thoughtfulness of the flowers, and called to thank her. “They’re beautiful!” I told her answering machine. “I was puzzled by the note – that I never seem to admire you – I do admire you, in fact I admire you a lot, and I’m sorry I haven’t communicated that better, and I promise to be more affirming in the future…”

                It didn’t take her long to call me back. “The card was supposed to say,” and she treated this very much like an announcement, “YOU NEVER CEASE TO AMAZE US!!” We had a good laugh over it, but her frustration was thinly disguised. “I’m going to make them send you another card!” she promised.

                “Don’t worry about it!” I assured her. “This will make a wonderful story!”

                “I wasn’t trying to send you another story,“ she insisted. “I was trying to send you words of affirmation!”

                A few days later, an oversized, elegant card arrived in the mail from the florist. Inside was a very carefully written message, but I had to read it again to make sure I had read it right. It said, “You never seem to amaze us”!!!

                The two other gals in my office had gotten in on the first card and we laughed until all three of us had tears rolling down our cheeks. I called my mother and we laughed some more. “Whatever you do,” I urged her, “Please don’t tell Diana!” But what did I do next? I called Diana! It was just too good! I knew I wouldn’t be able to keep it from her!

                “SO HELP ME,” she determined, “I’m going to make them do this over until they get it right!”

                “Maybe you should just write the card yourself,” I suggested.

                “I’m on my way to Hallmark right now!”  she answered, and I believed her. And she did send me a gorgeous card – with the right message – which I still have (along with the other two, but don’t tell Diana that).

                In spite of the frustration, we have laughed over those cards many times since.  “You never cease to amaze us!” has become a standard saying in our family. We’ve also wondered… What would have happened if someone else had gotten a card like that? We know people who would have been deeply offended, but would never have mentioned or clarified it, and would have carried bitterness and hostility over it for years. What a tragedy that would have been!

                It is soooo easy to have misunderstandings between people, isn’t it? My observation is that God has the same trouble.  There are several reasons, but one of them is that He does so much communicating through florists – through you and me! – and we don’t always get the message straight!

                I knew Diana’s heart, so when something came up that I didn’t understand, I could give her the benefit of the doubt as I went to her for some clarification. With God, even though we “see through a glass darkly”*, we do know His heart. We may not always understand His messages, and can’t at the moment go to Him face to face, but one day we will. And when he explains it, everything will make sense.

So I’m interested in a couple of things:

(1) Whether or not they’ve had a happy ending, what are some of the misunderstandings you’ve had with people? What did it take to get things straightened out? How could they have been avoided?

(2) As God’s “florists”, how can we make sure we are communicating His word accurately to people? How can we “test” the messages other people are giving for Him? Has there ever been a time you misunderstood God? How did you get things straightened out?

*1 Corinthians 13:12